On Friday the Oma watched my two year old, and I was able to go see Benjamin Pierces show at Concrete Ocean, which is a newer gallery off of Jefferson in the city. (www.benjamin314.com) I didn't really feel like going, as I didn't have a single date- every one of my gallery buddies were booked, and also because I just get tired in the evening. I did however, feel it was a bit necessary to go because I will be having a show there in just two short months. Mustering up the courage and energy to go alone was hard but I'm so glad I did. The show was beautiful and I consequently was inspired.
Ben is a local artist that shows nationally and is as humble as ever. He showed all very small pieces on wood panels that were part illustrative and part collage, where he let the wood panel show through in the finished piece. The thing that stood out to me the most thought was that the pieces were so eye pleasing although the subject matter was rather morbid at times. Bug like men with many different appendages stood out in my head, along with made up creatures that were half human, and half something extra- terrestrial. Their large heads would engulf words from found papers or stare at you with beady eyes. I wondered if he has done any illustration for childrens books.
I came home inspired and studied his website when my son went to sleep late into the rainy night. I decided that I needed to make small pieces as well for this gallery in an attempt to sell some work for them and also for myself. Every artist I know practically is doing this these days- making smaller pieces for the sluggish economy when their big pieces won't sell. This is just a fact of the market right now. All of my pieces I planned to show are large, and I felt a crunch. I thought that small pieces that would incorporate some of the elements that are already present in my larger paintings would be relatively easy to execute. I imagined my deer on a plywood landscape with snow and even thought about making small illustrations of the girls. I decided to use acrylic as I could work on the pieces daily- late at night and perhaps early in the morning.
My troubles started with what could have been disaster. I was working in our basement wood shop while my son was napping on Saturday to cut small pieces and a thin but long piece of plywood kicked back directly into my abdomen. This has never happened to me before, but it did that day, and it couldn't have happened at a worse time. It hurt like hell, and I was in shock. I had to gather some breaths and cried in the bathroom a bit- contemplating what to do before I called my husband who was on his bike ride.
Alex told me to go straight to labor and delivery and that he would give them a heads up on my arrival. I showed up with red eyes after waiting for my niece Madelaine to come over and watch Anton who luckily was still asleep.
They put my belly and baby on the monitor for two hours and everything was fine, thankfully. My sister in law (who is also an obstetrician) stayed with me for my stay there. That uterus is very, very strong and I realized how nature, or God, whichever term you choose to go by- makes such a perfect and protective environment for the most important things in life.
By Sunday though, without my husband I was a complete wreck after what had happened and doing all the mom things alone, and was having a hard time maintaining any level of cleanliness around the house. I was going nuts and needed to catch up and get some 'me time'. I cancelled going over to the Omas for a Sunday evening family dinner which I felt I just couldn't handle. By that time I just wanted to stare at the wall for an hour without interruptions rather than rush around to get to a dinner for three hours when so much needed to be done in my house and with my work. That conversation with my mother in law did not go well at all and I felt she just didn't understand me nor did she know what I needed.
Regarding the small works, they are definitely off to a slow start and so far I don't like them that much. They are harder than I realized they would be and are taking way more time, which is always the case. I don't want the work to look like Bens, and I'm not sure if they feel authentic enough at this point- illustrating the figurative aspects of the work is so far a bust. And, I am wondering why I am messing around with acrylic- I hate it.
I plan on bringing them in tonight for painting group to give them a shot in another environment. They will be much easier to tote around as well.
I went to pre-natal yoga last night for the first time ever as I can never go because my husband is not home in enough time for me to make it. I hired a sitter to cover the time span in between when I leave and he arrives. That was another revelation I had this weekend- that I needed some more help other than the help I have which has its limitations to say the least. I felt like crying in yoga a couple of times. Tonight I scheduled a pedicure at 4 p.m. and plan to get that done before I head off to painting group where I will have have everything packed in the car ahead of time. Today is Alex's half day so we are almost back to sanity...
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